Season 5 has been a boring, annoying, silly, ridiculous disaster, filled with coincidences and plot holes a plenty. Characters have been assassinated and turned into goody two shoes and become Morganites or members of the cult of Momo.
But Episode 12 titled 'Ner Tamid' is a whole nother level. It is not only the worst episode of any walking dead tv episode, but also one of the worst episodes of television I have ever seen.
Let's start with Charlie. Charlie decides to go look for a new place for the group to call home. This would be slightly plausible if she went in the day. But no, she decides to go in the middle of the night, when it is the most dangerous time. In addition to this, she is NOT a fully grown human, able to take out walkers with ease. She is most likely 11/12 at this period of time so would probably struggle against them. Plus she decides to go out on her own like a complete idiot. Then she insists that this church will be their new safe haven. What nonsense. Firstly theirs walkers around. Secondly, as June correctly says, there is no water nearby (though the writers can pull it out of thin air, because this is FTWD with magic and funsies candiesbeanies jimbos beerbos.
Next lets go to rabbi Jacob. He is literally safe and sound cooped up in his church/synagogue. It is locked and pretty useful as a safe haven. So why on earth is he opening the door to kill walkers, when he is essentially asking for a death wish and other zombies could burst in. I know he was doing mass, but really? (But he's the least of my many many issues.)
Now John and June, go looking for Charlie, which is fair. They want to protect her. But firstly how did they find a church, which as Charlie said was days away? So your telling me, there is only one church in this whole vicinity? NONSENSE. And of course they waste a car battery on a fucking light, for a guy they barely know, which is immediately wasted because the rabbi decides to risk everyone's lives by letting his undead congregation run amok. So what was the point of that at all?
NOW: Fucking coincidences:
1: John and June show up to the rabbi and present him with the car battery just as he was running out of light.
2: John and June show up in Al's van just as Logan's gang surround Sarah and Dwight, despite not knowing where the location of Sarah and Dwight were.
3: A ladder being directly on top of a car, so John can easily smash open the window.
4: 5 cars are neatly next to each other, despite this being an apocalypse, so John and June can each walk across.
5: Then we have OM NOM adventures with John and June where they build a bridge, which the writers MUST HAVE thought was a brilliant metaphor for fixing issues between friends.
There's probably more coincidences but this episode made me fall asleep, and wake up to the sound of HELP.
Then we have yet another filler scene of Dwight drinking Jimbo's beerbos.
Then the most ridiculous line of dialouge comes out of June's mouth. So Logan's gang shows up where the group is staying at. June says "How did he know where we were?". Well maybe if June and John and Morgan and Al and every goddam character on this fucking show didnt use a goddam walkie every 5 minutes then maybe Logan wouldnt find them.
But wasnt he out of gas last episode. Oh thats right, unlimited gas is the norm on this stupid show.
Then Logan drives up to a quarry. A FUCKING QUARRY. A FUCKING QUARRY!!
and thats how our episode ends.
WHAT HAS HAPPENED SINCE EPISODE 1?
NOTHING.
ABSOLUTELY FUCK ALL.
THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO WAY AMC CAN PUT THIS OUT AND SAY YEAH THATS WORTHY OF PUBLIC VIEWING.
Please fire Andrew Chambliss, Ian Goldberg and Scott Gimple.
Submitted August 31, 2019 at 11:06PM by sawinnz https://ift.tt/2MMxrqP
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