Somebody posted earlier today about being confused by Jimmy's attitude during the last episode. I can't seem to find it now, but here are some thoughts of mine.
[So, during his hearing as Jimmy reads his brother's note, he realizes the only way he can appear sincere, the only absolutely foolproof way, is to actually be sincere.
Kim has been trying to get Jimmy to open up this entire season but he keeps refusing, insisting that he has no feelings regarding his brother's death. Sometimes when somebody starts to get close to you they see things in you that you don't realize about yourself, or even that you don't want to be true. In this case, Kim sees how Jimmy feels about his brother. Jimmy wishes he didn't feel sad or guilty about Chuck's death. Guilt is an intense emotion that lots of - probably most - people try to suppress or deny.
She finally gets to hear him talk about these complicated feelings during his hearing. Feelings that Jimmy refuses to acknowledge for fear of giving Chuck too much power over him. Chuck hurt Jimmy too much with his final words to him, and now Jimmy refuses to let himself be sad about Chuck's death, even though he really and truly is. And now he has an opportunity to open up a bit.
Afterwards, he still doesn't want to acknowledge them. He knows that Kim probably knew that what he was saying to the panel was true. He knows how she felt about him seeing a therapist after all. But Jimmy, in refusing to admit his feelings over Chuck's death, makes sure that the first words out of his mouth are about what a lie all of that was and how he was smart enough to dupe a panel of judges. He doesn't want to see or acknowledge Kim's reaction because he doesn't want to face someone who knows his true self at that moment. Jimmy always feels like he's a sucker when he has to be genuine.
Typing all of this out, it may seem like I'm reading way too much into this. But this is really what all of Jimmy's strange behavior this season has been showing and leading up to. I've been in a similar emotionally repressed state in my lifetime, and I recognize it when I see it. Really beautiful storytelling here, I identified with so much of the emotion this season.
I really hope that there is a talk between Jimmy and Kim where Kim straight-up accuses him of this and he still denies it. I would really love to see this all laid out; no more subtext.
TL;DR: Jimmy made himself vulnerable for a moment and didn't want anybody to see it, not even Kim.](/spoiler)
Submitted November 01, 2018 at 07:44PM by umnothing https://ift.tt/2EXyRLY
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